Thursday, April 26, 2012

Gratitude: I have now




        I have now. It is the only thing I am in control of, and able to give away; this decision, this moment. I can promise Christ to live my life for him tomorrow, but I don’t even have that yet. I think it’s a lot harder to promise him now, and actually live for him. Promising him tomorrow seems like procrastinating to me. 
Unfortunately I don't capitalize on the now. I waste it hoping to accomplish things in the later now, that then get pushed off again. I am not always the greatest steward of my time. 
God has been speaking to me a lot about thankfulness. I am learning day by day to be thankful in the small things, and in doing so I see the bigger things to be thankful for as well. When we slow down the hurry and soak in this moment, time increases: it is fuller and I see more clearly. It is the daily things that build into and create our life. I don't want to just be thankful for climactic events a couple of times a year. I am thankful for the life I have been granted today. I am thankful for the new life Christ died to give me. I am thankful that I now live as Christ. It is one thing to say, and another entirely to live*. Does the life I live daily show others I am thankful for it, truly treating it as a gift? Tonight on my run God was speaking to me about ** “living a life worthy of the calling..” about living now, doing now, being now, no more saving things for later.
No more “should haves..”, “would haves..”, “I meant to..” or “good intentions”. I am easily distracted, and when someone is on my heart I need to call them, or write to them, or I get an idea I need to run to the computer and get it out or grab my journal and get it down on paper. So often I put things off until later, and they get left undone only to become a nice after thought. I promise you I have the best intentions. In learning to appreciate the simple things and live present in this moment I need to start doing. To stop putting off until later, because there may not be a later, or maybe there will be, but circumstances will have changed. 
I have put off learning languages, running, writing, phone dates, reading through the old testament, responding to emails- you name it and I have probably put it off. This week I have decided to full frontal attack Procrastination, because I’ve realized he’s a cousin of Apathy who I have sworn to not associate with. 
Last week I started running again, Oh the agony, I loathe the first two weeks of getting back into running, it’s awful. But I walked out my door and declared that I will be a person who completes things. I stood on my porch and shouted, “ I love running!”, because I might as well be joyful if I’m going to do it, and give the neighbors a good laugh whenever I am able. I’ve said I am going to run a 10k and by golly I will. I’ve also said I am going to blog every week, and I shall. I have wanted to send a couple snail mails a week to friends, and that’s going to start now. I will be a person who is known for following things through to completion. It’s one thing to be a dreamer and another to change the world. 
I believe all things in our life are intricately connected: spiritual, emotional and physical. And so I am starting with baby steps to be more faithful in each. I am proud to say I have run every other day the past 14 days. What started as 30 minute heaving runs have now become hour long slightly less heaving runs and I am looking forward to them at the end of the day instead of thinking of excuses to avoid them...10k here I come.
So what is it that you have been putting off? Are you avoiding dates with friends, because you will have to face things you are struggling with? Are you a fellow support raiser and have pushed it back on your to-do list that keeps growing? Are you a writer and you have let fear sneak in and tell you it’s not worth writing today, who will care, who will read it? Have you been meaning to finish the old testament, or the new or just be in the word? Have you been meaning to mow your neighbors lawn, or take that man you always see on the street corner to lunch and hear his story? Do you have ideas for a book, or just need to blog or journal? Have you been putting off turning in resumes, or training for a race? What’s stopping you? Do you need to declare your undying love to someone? ( that last one is a reach.. I know, but if you are inspired to, and do please share about it! It will make my heart happy.) 
Tonight I realized that I have never come in from a run and said, “ Man, that was a waste of time, I wish I didn’t do that..”, but so many times I have sat immobile and said, “I should totally go for a run right now.” 
I realize that there are a lot more important things than running, but like I’ve said before God speaks to me when I hit the trails, and for that reason alone I should run like I’m training for marathons, just to hear his voice. Tonight he has motivated me to run, to blog, to write chapters, to pray, to write letters, and to write snail mail; if you’d like to receive some then text me your address or send it to me in an email. I am always looking for another pen pal. It is a little ridiculous how excited I get when I find a card in the mail. I jump for joy, I smell it, I hold it close to my chest and hug it, and then I run inside to a comfy spot to sit and savor it. Receiving a hand written note makes me feel more loved than you could imagine (hint hint). Last week I received two! You know who you are and I love you more for it. Just saying. 
In conclusion. Get moving. Actually “Do” your to-do list. Be someone of diligence, of perseverance, and completion. Let’s set lofty goals and complete them together. Lets set small goals and see them through. Know that when the going gets tough there will be a choice to stop and say, “that’s enough”, but then you may sit later and say “I should have..” Lets decide to swing our arms a little harder, dig our shoes into the mud, take a deep breath and heave up the hill with no regrets, no good intentions, but dangerous people who set their hearts and minds on something and make vision become a reality. The best things in life take hard work to accomplish, they wouldn’t be as satisfying completed if they didn’t. 
Let’s become people who are different, because we stood up and set out to be, instead of sitting as the days passed us by, one “should have..”, “could have..”, “maybe someday..” at a time.

"Rome wasn't built in a day, but day by day she was built.."


*James 2:14-26 - " Faith without works is dead.."

** Ephesians 4:1 - " Therefore I, a prisoner (slave) for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, because you have been called by God."

*** Ephesians 4-5 is some of my favorite scripture. God cares about the daily. He even says don't let the sun go down on your anger, that's one night, and even that is important. Let every one of our days, hours, minutes..be a pleasing aroma to God the Father following the example of Christ. If we don't strive for perfection whether it can be accomplished here on earth or not, then what is our standard? Too often our standard is too low, it is only Christ that we should measure against, not our neighbor. Carefully determine what pleases the Lord. Awake O sleeper, rise up from the dead and Christ will give you light. Wake up! Wake up sons and daughters, wake up SLAVES of Christ. A slave is not lazy, apathetic, or a procrastinator, but attentive to his masters every need and dependent on his every provision. He is in tune like a shadow to his king. And his king takes care of him. We are called to Christ in that way. That we would be bound to him above all others, and everyday is what concerns him, his likes, his heart, and they become our own. Our will, becomes Christ's will. We have traded our life for his. SO be careful how you live. Don't live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the MOST of every opportunity in these evil days. Don't act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. Oh Lord too many of my days have passed by not worthy to remember: thoughtless. Center me, focus me that your will would be carried out through me everyday, and there would be no more questioning the purpose of what am I doing here.



No comments:

Post a Comment