“The who leads to the do”
I am a “doer.” I have constant “to-do” lists running through my mind, on scraps of paper, and now on my phone with cute little check boxes. I have to constantly fight against a works faith of earning God’s grace; “Martha-Syndrome” some might call it. (Luke 10:38-42)
Anyone who knows me well, knows I love to make plans, and then change my mind, and then change it again, and then maybe one more time for good measure. What can I say, I just get excited at the immense amount of possibilities. Making the commitment to go on The World Race was a big deal for me, because I was saying I would be there without changing my mind for 11 months. I am more of the month to month lease type, I have always thought making plans is stifling the spirit.
As I have grown in my walk with the Lord I thought I was being more open to the spirit, by not making commitments, so at any moment I could pick up and go where he was calling me. But what God has shown me is that’s not for him, but for fear I have done that. I have had a fear of commitments, a fear of discipline, a fear of doing something meaningless, and a fear of “what if I can’t...?” Misty Edwards spoke at the One Thing conference in Kansas City for New Years Eve weekend, and what she spoke on was the fear of Running Aimlessly. Her words resonated in my heart. I could relate to her pacing back and forth in her house, outside, and constantly in her mind- the questions:
What will I do with my life? What will I become? What will I achieve?
WHAT?
WHAT?
WHAT?
God started whispering to me through her message there, and gave me the answer I was looking for the next week at the Search Light conference put on by Adventures in Missions Jan 6-12th in Gainesville, GA. “The who leads to the do” is a summation of what God spoke to me. One of the speakers at the conference gave a word on “My people perish without vision.”(Proverbs 29:18) I will never be the same. He asked instead of worrying about what the next step is, and planning out our entire life, to ask the questions who will we become? Who will people know us as? Knowing God’s vision for us is a life or death matter, he says,“the people perish without it.”
I’ve written out a couple times who the Lord says I am, but I didn’t look at it as my life vision. To become that person, and let the Lord dictate the way. He went on to say if you were to die today, what would those closest to you, in the work place, and passerby's say of you? Would what they said line up with the person God created you to be? If not, how can we get there?
Furthermore, What are the dreams he has put inside of you, the passions and desires?
When someone meets you for 30 seconds, or has known you for years can they see certain things in your character? Do you have characteristics that you want people to take away from your life whenever they encounter you? That no matter who you meet they leave saying “ so and so is: joyful, full of faith, and compassionate..etc.” And so I pondered, what is it that people see in me?
God is all about relationship, Jesus came and showed us God the Father wanted obedience, not sacrifice. That the Father wanted our hearts, not just outward displays. Now don’t get me wrong, faith without works is dead ( James 2:17), but in order to Fish we have to first follow (Luke 5) . SO I sat down with God and asked him those questions above about myself. I asked him what he was trying to teach me now, and to have vision for who he wanted me to be.
In the weeks before this, and even the lasts several months on the race, I had not had clarity about what my next step was. Suddenly, when I wasn’t asking my “thing, or place” is when God gave me the next step.
This is what I wrote that day: I was created to mother the motherless, to remind those robbed of their identity who they are, and who they were created to be. I was created to create, to bring Joy, to go to the hardest and darkest places and bring life, to restore the Joy of the Lord with music, dancing, painting and cooking- to make a space where children can be children before the Lord, and be risen up into strong men and women of God. I was created to serve, and to speak, and to call people to work alongside me. I was created to be a mover, a shaker, a pioneer, a teacher, a jack of all trades. I was created to always see the glass not half full, or half empty, but over flowing. I was not created to worry, or fear, but instead given a spirit that walks in love, courage, and self-discipline.
I prayed some more, and again wrote down India, the middle east, street kids, orphans, discipleship, David heart, let the redeemed of the Lord say so, house of dreams, hope..
Then the Lord asked me, “What is it that you want to do Rachael?” If I could choose, what would I do to bring Kingdom?
I would go and be discipled by someone with a heart like David’s-passionate and sold out for the Lord. I would intern with a non-profit, and work with or open a home for street kids in India where they were given counseling, rehabilitation, schooling, and allowed to just be kids. To learn to create through cooking, writing, painting, singing, dancing, drawing, and any other art form. I would be there to be a mother for them and train them up in the ways of the Lord, believing the Lord would capture their heart and use them in mighty ways throughout India, and the middle east.
I’d also want to do something in the states, to be someone who goes back and forth, because I want to see the American church woken up as well.
Later that evening Andrew Shearman spoke, and forgive me for quoting “stuff Christian girls say”, but I saw a David spirit in him. I saw a man passionate about the Lord, about revival, and about discipling a generation to go out and bring Kingdom. I looked at Erin and said, “E, this could be it..” She just looked at me, like she does when I get one of my ideas, and rolled her eyes. “Oh, Lord, here we go.” she said.
After he spoke I went and talked to him some more about G42 the discipleship school he runs in Mijas, Spain. I went home and prayed about it, slept on it, and had a dream about a little girl from India, telling me I was the one she had been waiting for. I know it sounds crazy, but our God is a crazy radical one, and he is always speaking! I went to the conference in the morning, and again as Andrew Shearman spoke I heard, “ this is the one.” I was unsure what “track” I would even apply for in the school, and Andrew encouraged me to look up the mentors.
The program I was leaning toward was non profits, and when I clicked on the mentor for that track this is the first thing that popped up:
~RESCUE STREET KIDS IN INDIA~
I started crying. No way. As I read on I realized this is exactly where I am supposed to be. The man who spearheads Light Force and would be my mentor, is George Ridley. They just bought property for Light Force in India, and will be partnering with Sunitha in Andhra Pradesh. You can read more about the vision here:
I applied that night for the generation 42 discipleship program, and have not looked back since. There have been many other opportunities available, that the old me would have jumped at in a second, but I have such a peace and confirmation in my heart that this is where God is calling me. This is a season of preparation and mentoring. A couple of weeks ago I received my acceptance letter, and God has continued to give more vision and open door after door. It has blown me away. To find out more about G42 discipleship school visit:
I am currently in Raleigh, NC until March 6th. Tomorrow I will be going to hear Heidi Baker speak at Catch the Fire Ministries. It is incredible how God has brought us both here at the same time. I have heard about her so much this year, had multiple people prophesy that her and I are connected somehow, listened to her preach, read testimonies of the ministry God has entrusted her and her husband Roland with, Iris Ministries, and I am anxious to finally meet her.
I leave for Spain on a one way ticket the first week of July. The school is for 6 months, and I will hopefully be working/interning with Light Force in India for I am not sure how long afterwards. In the meantime I will be in Portland, Oregon working, and support raising. The cost of the discipleship school is $6,300, and my support goal is $8,000 to also help cover airfare, health insurance, and other expenses that are not included in tuition.
Thank you all so much for continuing to follow my journey. Thank you for those of you who supported me on the race in prayer, reading my blogs, and financially. The opportunity to go on the World Race you helped make a reality has changed my life, and my walk with the Lord. Every testimony I have is also yours, and I hope you continue to invest in me and those the Lord is calling me to. I can never go back to who I was now that my eyes have been opened.
“I won’t be satisfied until the earth looks just like heaven.”
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